Wednesday 20 September 2017

#Fear does it control your life ? Maslow - religion - Pablo Escobar

Early yesterday morning I did a 12 mile solitary training run. It went relatively ok and one of the main reasons was I successfully didn't think much about the running while I was doing it - ha! What was I thinking about instead? Well - as it turned out the subject of two blogs came bubbling in my mind. (I had plenty of time to kill - over 2 hours!) Anyway - the second of them I commit to paper now - the first one I am not so sure I should write.

Here are some personal thoughts. I am thinking out loud.

What motivates us has always interested me because I believe there is a reason for the things we do and choices we make - even if those reasons lie deep in our sub-conscious or if we do not understand them (or choose not to acknowledge or perhaps confront them).

I have made the case in a previous blog the key to happiness or at least contentment is being able to put your life into context that makes sense to you ie to understand why I do things - to try to understand other peoples behaviour and why they do things that have the potential to impact our lives.

The tools I have incorporated to help me are amongst others:-
  • Maslow's "hierarchy of needs" has been my useful yardstick. For many years I have used it as a bench mark to understand my motivations. I guess the motivator for this blog and the ones before them is now self-actualization.
  • Acceptance of Darwin's "survival of the fittest" theory. We are animals - and while we might make attempts to be civilised, human beings are driven by base animal instincts. (for instance - Desmond Morris - The Naked Ape - an enjoyable read and the premise is correct - even if some of his observations might be a bit of a stretch).
  • An acceptance that there is no benevolent God watching over with the ability to affect our  lives. As a consequence absolving yourself by asking for forgiveness is rubbish and self deluding. You are responsible for your own life and your own decisions. "Goodness" should be enough in itself and not motivated by earning Brownie points from God to impress him.
  • Death is inevitable and part of a universal cycle.
  • An acceptance that true happiness is not found in materialism as Gandhi or the teachings of Buddhism.
The other day I was watching a Netflix about the Colombian drug cartel leader Pablo Escobar. He said people follow religion out of fear. He went on to say that all life is determined by fear. He used violence to instill fear to gain control. I am not advocating Escobar's perverted view on life but there is something in an argument that fear is potentially a huge motivator for us and on reflection can be tied in with Maslow and Darwin - and I am going to add Gandhi and Buddhism.

So what form can fear take in our modern lives? Here are a few random ones - possibilities as I think on the hoof!
  • Fear of dying
  • Fear of being killed.
  • Fear for your loved ones.
  • Fear of being judged by God if God exists.
  • Fear of not having enough money to exist.
  • Fear of not being wealthy.
  • Fear of not keeping up with the Jones's
  • Fear of being lonely.
  • Fear of not being valued or loved.
  • Fear of not being popular.
  • Fear of not looking attractive.
  • Fear of not being fit.
  • Fear of not coming up to standard.
  • Fear of not being the best.
  • Fear of failure.
  • Fear of not living a meaningful life.
  • Fear for your legacy.
  • Etc etc.
Fear is a strong word. (an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat). In many instances it could be better described as "concern" (be relevant or important to - affect or involve - to worry (someone) - make anxious) - perhaps. 

Maybe a way of contemplating/advocating a route to a happy life - might be to remove or massively reduce those fears or concerns (stresses) from your head. One way is to work to make your circumstances secure - or confront or overcome your fears, to build up your self esteem if it is needed (as Darwin & Maslow) - The other way is to live a smaller simpler life where there is less at stake (as Gandhi & Buddhism and probably Maslow) - less to lose. I guess in our time - a lot of that relates to materialism and social pressures - pressures fostered in the 21st century by 24 hour news and particularly by Facebook and other forms of social media. A combination of each has been my approach.

Someone wrote - life is a struggle and then you die! This all reads a bit negative. I think we need to confront and overcome our fears - to challenge ourselves. Satisfaction - peace and happiness comes from within - the knowledge you have not given in but the opposite - in whatever form it takes - you have done the best you can, fought the battles you have needed to fight and ignored the ones that you perceived from your insights were just not worth it or over which you had no control. Having said all of that I have been referred to as an island on an island and it is true - I choose to rarely let down the drawbridge - ha!


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