I am just back from Exeter having spent a special few days with my daughter and husband and my two darling little grand daughters who are Annabelle now 6 and Ayla 3.
Christmas preparations were very much evident and one of the lovely things I was able to do was to attend (with mum and dad) Annabelle's school Christmas Nativity play.
The nativity story is of course being played out in thousands of schools this time of year, as they have been for countless past years. I guess there was nothing particularly special about Annabelle's nativity play except my granddaughter was in it and that made it exceptional from our point of view. It was a lovely little half hour production. The basic nativity story was unchanging of course - played out by the dear little children in their hand made low budget costumes. All the songs they sang were gentle and tuneful and original (to me). Many of the children in varying states of nervousness and clarity spoke a few lines on their own (well done Annabelle!). It was especially moving when all the children sang together and fascinating to watch the little persons remember the words and play out the actions in unison or sometimes not - ha! Many a parent and grandparent had a tear in their eye. Amazing something so simple could feel and be so special.
My overwhelming thought was how vulnerable and innocent and genuine little children are. This is not new knowledge of course but sat there for that half hour or so really brought it to the fore in my mind. It is a beautiful thing. However it was thought provoking too - unsettling - because the wider world is not innocent - people are not always genuine and vulnerabilities are of course often exploited. All children - all of us - have many challenges to face - but somehow you feel you want to cocoon your offspring - all little children - from those negativities but that is not reality or probably even desirable.
I find myself asking what can we do to help them? Thinking out loud - what should we do?
Well several things came to my mind. The first is based on something an old uncle said to me light years ago. He said of kids - "if you love them son and they know you love them - they will turn out alright". Something Victoria said made me smile - she said I tell the girls - "there are many children loved as much as you but none who are loved more". It is shocking there are children out there who are unloved. It is too horrible to think about - but thankfully there are people out there that do offer wonderful foster care. Those that do it for the right reasons and do it well - are saints.
Of the parenting role I think a crucial objective is to try to do everything possible to help our offspring develop a bullet proof self esteem because without strong self esteem I cannot see how it is possible to be truly happy (and all we really want is for our little children to grow up healthy and safe and fundamentally - happy.) In today's world young people are under so much pressure - particularly from social media and it can start at an early age. Somehow children must learn to be themselves and not be worried about what everyone else thinks. Very hard to do. I am not giving advice here but I mentioned a parents understandable inclination to want to cocoon young children so they are safe and happy. However and somehow children have to learn to cope - to be tested - to tackle adversity - even fail on occasions - because out of that comes real self confidence and an ability to survive in a Darwin world. Am I talking about tough love? Maybe I am.
Another thought - religion. Those dear little children in the nativity were so innocent. They absorbed the nativity story. It was gently done and did not feel particularly Christian. I rail against "faith" schools. I do not think it is right that children should be indoctrinated with their parents/schools view while they are so vulnerable. I will concede religion should be taught in schools but in a multi faith academic way. When children know their own mind they can make their own minds up. It is immoral how young children are exploited by religious zealots.
I know I am a pontificator - ha! Just one more thought and it was very much prompted by the nativity play. It is easy to say "we should leave the planet in a better state than we found it - (or at least no worse)". We know that - but it is not how our generation is living in the world as a collective. Those little 6 year olds have to follow us on our planet. What state are we actually going to leave it in for them? I feel guilty about that. We are too materialistic. We are too selfish. What can we do? What should we do? What can we change? What should we change that will make a difference? As an individual probably not very much - but that is a cop out. Being so clearly propmpted by the collective sight of those innocent little children has brought these thoughts to mind - pollution - global warming - over population - intensive farming. But I am likely to be a hypocrite like most others. Head will go back in the sand and hope for the best! That is crap. I have to make some more changes - somehow. It is the right thing to do.
Christmas preparations were very much evident and one of the lovely things I was able to do was to attend (with mum and dad) Annabelle's school Christmas Nativity play.
The nativity story is of course being played out in thousands of schools this time of year, as they have been for countless past years. I guess there was nothing particularly special about Annabelle's nativity play except my granddaughter was in it and that made it exceptional from our point of view. It was a lovely little half hour production. The basic nativity story was unchanging of course - played out by the dear little children in their hand made low budget costumes. All the songs they sang were gentle and tuneful and original (to me). Many of the children in varying states of nervousness and clarity spoke a few lines on their own (well done Annabelle!). It was especially moving when all the children sang together and fascinating to watch the little persons remember the words and play out the actions in unison or sometimes not - ha! Many a parent and grandparent had a tear in their eye. Amazing something so simple could feel and be so special.
My overwhelming thought was how vulnerable and innocent and genuine little children are. This is not new knowledge of course but sat there for that half hour or so really brought it to the fore in my mind. It is a beautiful thing. However it was thought provoking too - unsettling - because the wider world is not innocent - people are not always genuine and vulnerabilities are of course often exploited. All children - all of us - have many challenges to face - but somehow you feel you want to cocoon your offspring - all little children - from those negativities but that is not reality or probably even desirable.
I find myself asking what can we do to help them? Thinking out loud - what should we do?
Well several things came to my mind. The first is based on something an old uncle said to me light years ago. He said of kids - "if you love them son and they know you love them - they will turn out alright". Something Victoria said made me smile - she said I tell the girls - "there are many children loved as much as you but none who are loved more". It is shocking there are children out there who are unloved. It is too horrible to think about - but thankfully there are people out there that do offer wonderful foster care. Those that do it for the right reasons and do it well - are saints.
Of the parenting role I think a crucial objective is to try to do everything possible to help our offspring develop a bullet proof self esteem because without strong self esteem I cannot see how it is possible to be truly happy (and all we really want is for our little children to grow up healthy and safe and fundamentally - happy.) In today's world young people are under so much pressure - particularly from social media and it can start at an early age. Somehow children must learn to be themselves and not be worried about what everyone else thinks. Very hard to do. I am not giving advice here but I mentioned a parents understandable inclination to want to cocoon young children so they are safe and happy. However and somehow children have to learn to cope - to be tested - to tackle adversity - even fail on occasions - because out of that comes real self confidence and an ability to survive in a Darwin world. Am I talking about tough love? Maybe I am.
Another thought - religion. Those dear little children in the nativity were so innocent. They absorbed the nativity story. It was gently done and did not feel particularly Christian. I rail against "faith" schools. I do not think it is right that children should be indoctrinated with their parents/schools view while they are so vulnerable. I will concede religion should be taught in schools but in a multi faith academic way. When children know their own mind they can make their own minds up. It is immoral how young children are exploited by religious zealots.
I know I am a pontificator - ha! Just one more thought and it was very much prompted by the nativity play. It is easy to say "we should leave the planet in a better state than we found it - (or at least no worse)". We know that - but it is not how our generation is living in the world as a collective. Those little 6 year olds have to follow us on our planet. What state are we actually going to leave it in for them? I feel guilty about that. We are too materialistic. We are too selfish. What can we do? What should we do? What can we change? What should we change that will make a difference? As an individual probably not very much - but that is a cop out. Being so clearly propmpted by the collective sight of those innocent little children has brought these thoughts to mind - pollution - global warming - over population - intensive farming. But I am likely to be a hypocrite like most others. Head will go back in the sand and hope for the best! That is crap. I have to make some more changes - somehow. It is the right thing to do.
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