#Benidorm how it was for the fam

We are just back from the renowned - maybe infamous holiday resort of Benidorm - Spain. We? Myself and my daughter and 3 sons.

Here is a banal description of Benidorm - taken from the Benidorm Tourist Board :

Benidorm is a leisure and holiday town located on the southern Spain, 41 km. (25 miles) from Alicante on the Costa Blanca coast. Benidorm is one of the most popular choice of millions of holidaymakers every year in Spain and Europe. It is one of the world's largest and vibrant resorts. And it continues to be the ultimate holiday destination as there are lots of things to do in Benidorm for the holidaymakers. “Benidorm, land of light and fun. I want people to know that if I ever get lost, they should look for me in Benidorm”. Pablo González. Benidorm is beaches; Levante, Poniente and Mal Pas with all the services provided by the city that lies behind them. It only occurs somewhere like Río de Janeiro, Miami Beach or Mar del Plata, but with the attraction of Las Vegas.

Here is a more informative description taken from Wiki :

Benidorm is popular with tourists from the UK, Ireland, Germany, Belgium and the Netherlands. Benidorm's initial growth in popularity can be attributed to the package holiday explosion, and continues year round, due to the night-life based around the central concentration of bars and clubs. The large number of free cabaret acts that start around 21:00 and continue into the early hours sets Benidorm apart from other similar cities.

The author and Guardian journalist Giles Tremlett identified the city as the birthplace of package tourism in the book Ghosts of Spain: Travels Through a Country's Hidden Past and remarked that culturally the city contradicted conservative notions of National Catholicism that General Franco had espoused.The accessibility of Benidorm to a wider social strata made the town into an ever so easy target for highbrow sarcasm, as by Jani Allan in the Sunday Times in 1990: "These days you just have to look at the numbers of wide-bodied jets bearing wide-bodied holidaymakers to Benidorm to realise that package holidays and airborne cattle trucks make fun in the sun accessible to everyone."

In the 1980s Benidorm developed a reputation for British drunken lager louts and violent binge drinking. This did not happen all year round but mainly in the summer months of July and August.During the 1980s families were put off visiting the city. However today the problem of drunkenness and lager louts has largely gone and Benidorm has mellowed. Now there is a very good police presence in the town which has greatly improved safety and provided for a good atmosphere. Nightlife is very popular and mainly involves cabaret acts and tapas bars.

The town is now very popular with families. Also, more and more elderly people from Northern Europe decide to stay there during the winter. This made 'Benidorm' into something of a synonym for elderly people in those countries, as can be seen in the Flemish candid camera programme Benidorm Bastards.

Benidorm has three major beaches: Playa de Levante (Valencian: Platja de Llevant), Playa de Poniente (Valencian: Platja de Ponent) and Playa de Mal Pas (Valencian: Platja del Mal Pas); all of them have had a blue flag since 1987, the maximum quality standard recognised by the European Union. The Gran Hotel Bali, a four-star hotel located in this city since 2002, is a 186-metre-tall building which stood as the tallest skyscraper in Spain for five years, until it was surpassed by the CTBA towers in Madrid and Intempo building, also in Benidorm.

The town is divided into five parts: Poniente (Ponent or 'sun setting') and Levante (Llevant or 'sun rising'), each fronted by a beach of the same name; the old town (also called El Caste l); La Cala situated to the west side of Poniente; and El Rincón de Loix (or El Racó de l'Oix) situated to the east side of Levante. Between the two beaches lies a rocky promontory and the port.

The old city occupies the promontory and the area immediately inland, while most of the hotels occupy the more recently developed sections inland from the two beaches. A few miles from shore is an uninhabited island which provides a dramatic centrepiece to the seascape.

In 1954 Pedro Zaragoza Orts, the then young Mayor of Benidorm, created the Plan General de Ordenación (city building plan) that ensured, via a complex construction formula, every building would have an area of leisure land, guaranteeing a future free of the excesses of cramped construction seen in other areas of Spain. It is the only city in Spain that still adheres to this rigid rule. Most of the streets in the city are named after places such as Avenida de Uruguay, Avenida del Mediterráneo, Calle Pekín, etc. Avenida del Mediterráneo is a wide avenue that crosses Levante and links the old town with Rincón. Avenida Europa crosses Levante at right angles linking the western city limits with the Levante beach.

Before I give my assessment of Benidorm I will quickly explain why we went - because it is maybe an odd choice for us. I have been to Spain quite a few times and been to the Canaries on many occasions for winter sun - but I have never been on a bargain package holiday to Spain. Quite frankly the Benidorm described above is not really for me. However the fam wanted to take the opportunity to do something different together, something fun and not too expensive - something easy because limited time for us was a factor. One of my sons particularly finds the comedy show "Benidorm" funny - and we had also seen episodes of "Bargain Brits in the Sun" which is based around Benidorm. My son James loves a party. Benidorm was suggested tongue in cheek. We thought why not - lets give it a go. Is it as outrageous as it seems - ha!?

Here is my description/observations based on just a few days holiday (so not claiming to be an expert or that I am even right!) : I am going to use bullet points - forgive me they are likely to be a bit random !

Benidorm is easy to get to from the UK. Fly into Alicante - but the transfer is a bit of a pain and a cost.

Benidorm is skyscrapers - and not particularly attractive ones at that - odd looking infact. However they are set apart and avenues are mainly wide - so it is not claustrophobic. Traffic is not an issue.

The beach front is lovely with a wide promenade behind. It does have something of Rio about it as claimed.

There are apparently over 2000 bars/restaurants in Benidorm. This competition drives prices down and it is a good value place.

Surprisingly there is very little touting and any there was was very low key. You do not get hassled in Benidorm as you do in so many places.

Benidorm is not a noisy place - despite the fact that most bars have music and many live music.

Benidorm feels safe enough. All big bars have professional door staff and any police presence was low key. I read Benidorm has cleaned up its act - it has.

We were out of school holidays so very few children around. What surprised us was the absence of thoughtless teenagers. Benidorm appeals to the party goers for sure - it is not a sophisticated place but the age range is late 20's upwards. This changes things. People were friendly - sure there was plenty of booze flowing - but people were there for a good time. There was no sense of aggression whatsoever - which was great.

Obesity is an international crisis - very evident in Benidorm.

It seems to be abnormal not to have large and dodgy tatoos!

There are plenty of "Madges". Mobility scooters are everywhere including tandem ones. They can be hired very cheaply. Many obese people seem to use them because they prefer not to walk. They park up outside the bar and walk in!

People watching is great in Benidorm. Try not to be too judgemental. You will have some bizarre conversations!

It seems there is not too much Spanish spoke in Benidorm!

Food in Benidorm seems to be limited in range or is it quality despite the number of cafes and restaurants.

All bars and entertainment is free. It seems like performers/musicians turn up on a just in time basis - do a slot and then off to the next one.

Taxis are fine - all metered and fair.

Bands are party pleasers - something for everyone.

Inside the big bars there are heavy screens with the louder music within.

You can't win on the bull riding. The person operating it can increase the speed and bucking to make sure you don't.

My tip - get stuck in - embrace Benidorm for what it is - unsophisticated hedonism - and don't be too judgemental until you get home!

So a typical Benidorm day for the Shoulder's :

Breakfast at 8.30.

Chill time in and around the pool.

Maybe a walk to the beach - a beer - a light lunch.

More pool sunbed chill time.

Out at 7.30 - beer beachfront - dinner Old Town - sometimes with a cabaret.

10pm karaoke, live music and dancing in the "Square" (although there is no square as fas as I know - but just a series of streets that might form a square!).

Latest time home 3am +

To sum up. We really enjoyed Benidorm. We had a great fun time. Memorable - but we were drained after 4 nights of excess. Would I go back to Benidorm. I wouldn't say no - but I think we are all suited to a more wholesome sort of holiday!

Here are a few photos :