Prince Harry has received many plaudits this weekend for being "brave" - for talking openly about his "issues". Apparently the stiff upper lip approach is no longer valid - we have to "deal" with our negatives by seeking counselling as soon as possible.
Is this good advice? It may be right for some. I suspect wrong for just as many.
More widely I think perpetuating a victim mentality is a blight on our society. It is always someone else's fault or you need closure by dragging up every last detail! You have a "right" to support. Poor you. How can you possibly be happy. How can you possibly take responsibility for your own life and the decisions you make? Of course there are many vested interests pedaling this type of philosophy to life - experts - councilors (a 2 year correspondence course ?) - life coaches - the ambulance chasing legal profession - politicians after your easy vote promising to help you be happy!
In October 2014 I wrote a blog on these type of issues. I have copied and pasted it below here :
I shall start by saying this is an entirely lay view. It is neither couched to be offensive or politically correct - but practical, responsible and well meaning.
In the last round of political conferences the Lib Dems described Mental Health as the Cinderella service within the NHS and pledged more money and more priority. The other parties are following suit. Mental Health is the latest big issue of our time to be confronted or cynically the latest attempt to catch your vote.
Clegg said he wanted parents chatting at the school gate to be able to refer to their mental illness as freely as they would any physical illness. Mental illness should no longer be taboo - it is part of life and a large percentage of the population will suffer some mental illness problem in their lives. Fine!
The call is for the NHS to respond to this challenge with more understanding, commitment and resources. The call is for more specialists. The message is - the NHS will be there to help you. No longer do you have to suffer in silence. I wish to clearly state anyone suffering from serious mental illness should be properly helped by the NHS. I have no issue with this whatsoever. So again fine!
But is it fine? I have a few problems - I have a few concerns.
My first concern is the definition of "mental" illness. The spectrum is vast.
My second concern is the balance between the rights of the individual to receive NHS help with their mental illness issues and their responsibility to help themselves.
My third and it follows from the second above - a concern that we are creating, enforcing, perpetuating a "victim" mentality - which is likely to make an individuals health worse in the long run.
My point is this - many people have self-esteem issues, many people have a weight problem, many people enter in what is often referred to as a mid life crisis. These problems (in the new thinking) are now being referred to as "mental" illness in the same way as Bi Polar disorder or Schizophrenia is correctly referred to as "mental" illness.
As a consequence I believe it is likely that the NHS will be overwhelmed by "mental" illness "victims" knocking on the door seeking someone to solve their unhappiness. This will not help them - because they are psychologically passing on the responsibility for their problem to someone else (doctors and the NHS) nor will it help the tax payer who has to fund the NHS or as resources are finite - improve the support for those who really need mental health treatment.
I shall spell it out. It is not the State's responsibility to make your life happy - to give point or purpose to it. It is counter productive for the NHS/Gov't to assume responsibility for bolstering your self esteem just because you are lazy and weak willed and have become obese from eating too much and not doing enough (any) exercise. These people are not "victims". Their problems are their responsibility and of their own making. It is within their control to change their life - to make better decisions. If they do it for themselves they will feel better anyway and it will be more sustainable.
The answer lies in emphasizing their responsibilities to themselves - to enforce that they are in charge of their life - their happiness. It is not constructive to give them the opportunity to put the responsibility for solving their problems on the NHS - to approach life with a victim mentality - poor me - no one has helped me - I have been let down!
We cannot afford this indulgence anyway and should be very wary of vested interests building their empire and gullible politicians scrabbling for votes on the pretext of a "caring" agenda.
Is this good advice? It may be right for some. I suspect wrong for just as many.
More widely I think perpetuating a victim mentality is a blight on our society. It is always someone else's fault or you need closure by dragging up every last detail! You have a "right" to support. Poor you. How can you possibly be happy. How can you possibly take responsibility for your own life and the decisions you make? Of course there are many vested interests pedaling this type of philosophy to life - experts - councilors (a 2 year correspondence course ?) - life coaches - the ambulance chasing legal profession - politicians after your easy vote promising to help you be happy!
In October 2014 I wrote a blog on these type of issues. I have copied and pasted it below here :
I shall start by saying this is an entirely lay view. It is neither couched to be offensive or politically correct - but practical, responsible and well meaning.
In the last round of political conferences the Lib Dems described Mental Health as the Cinderella service within the NHS and pledged more money and more priority. The other parties are following suit. Mental Health is the latest big issue of our time to be confronted or cynically the latest attempt to catch your vote.
Clegg said he wanted parents chatting at the school gate to be able to refer to their mental illness as freely as they would any physical illness. Mental illness should no longer be taboo - it is part of life and a large percentage of the population will suffer some mental illness problem in their lives. Fine!
The call is for the NHS to respond to this challenge with more understanding, commitment and resources. The call is for more specialists. The message is - the NHS will be there to help you. No longer do you have to suffer in silence. I wish to clearly state anyone suffering from serious mental illness should be properly helped by the NHS. I have no issue with this whatsoever. So again fine!
But is it fine? I have a few problems - I have a few concerns.
My first concern is the definition of "mental" illness. The spectrum is vast.
My second concern is the balance between the rights of the individual to receive NHS help with their mental illness issues and their responsibility to help themselves.
My third and it follows from the second above - a concern that we are creating, enforcing, perpetuating a "victim" mentality - which is likely to make an individuals health worse in the long run.
My point is this - many people have self-esteem issues, many people have a weight problem, many people enter in what is often referred to as a mid life crisis. These problems (in the new thinking) are now being referred to as "mental" illness in the same way as Bi Polar disorder or Schizophrenia is correctly referred to as "mental" illness.
As a consequence I believe it is likely that the NHS will be overwhelmed by "mental" illness "victims" knocking on the door seeking someone to solve their unhappiness. This will not help them - because they are psychologically passing on the responsibility for their problem to someone else (doctors and the NHS) nor will it help the tax payer who has to fund the NHS or as resources are finite - improve the support for those who really need mental health treatment.
I shall spell it out. It is not the State's responsibility to make your life happy - to give point or purpose to it. It is counter productive for the NHS/Gov't to assume responsibility for bolstering your self esteem just because you are lazy and weak willed and have become obese from eating too much and not doing enough (any) exercise. These people are not "victims". Their problems are their responsibility and of their own making. It is within their control to change their life - to make better decisions. If they do it for themselves they will feel better anyway and it will be more sustainable.
The answer lies in emphasizing their responsibilities to themselves - to enforce that they are in charge of their life - their happiness. It is not constructive to give them the opportunity to put the responsibility for solving their problems on the NHS - to approach life with a victim mentality - poor me - no one has helped me - I have been let down!
We cannot afford this indulgence anyway and should be very wary of vested interests building their empire and gullible politicians scrabbling for votes on the pretext of a "caring" agenda.
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